Hugs. You can always adopt
Not being a mother. I can’t look at happy pictures of my friends with their kids. That makes me cry... I’m trying to accept that I may never be a mother, but it hurts to try to accept such a thing.
Thanks! Yes, I’ll consider that option.
I understand how you feel though. For a while I thought that may be where I was headed, and it was so devastating. Seeing prenant women or people announcing they’re expecting was harder for me than seeing families with young children. I was in tears all the time. But the option to adopt got me through and at some point I genuinely felt that it made no difference. Life felt so much better after this realization. Good luck! My story has a happy ending and I know that yours will too whatever happens.
Hugs. You can always adoptNot being a mother. I can’t look at happy pictures of my friends with their kids. That makes me cry... I’m trying to accept that I may never be a mother, but it hurts to try to accept such a thing.
Thanks! Yes, I’ll consider that option.
So did you adopt? But if you never carried a baby inside you, how do you know it made no difference?
I understand how you feel though. For a while I thought that may be where I was headed, and it was so devastating. Seeing prenant women or people announcing they’re expecting was harder for me than seeing families with young children. I was in tears all the time. But the option to adopt got me through and at some point I genuinely felt that it made no difference. Life felt so much better after this realization. Good luck! My story has a happy ending and I know that yours will too whatever happens.
Hugs. You can always adoptNot being a mother. I can’t look at happy pictures of my friends with their kids. That makes me cry... I’m trying to accept that I may never be a mother, but it hurts to try to accept such a thing.
Thanks! Yes, I’ll consider that option.
Because I realized the infinite capacity to love another person once I made myself imagine being a mother (which was very very hard). Everything just fell in place after that
So did you adopt? But if you never carried a baby inside you, how do you know it made no difference?
It hasn't really broken me, but as I get toward the end of my tenure clock, I realize that my years ~23-33 passed by so quickly. Perhaps this happens to everybody and is not related to academia, but I can't help to think that obsessing over things that are relatively arcane narrows your experiences. I did my PhD in a terrific city, and yet I barely took advantage of what it had to offer.
Because I realized the infinite capacity to love another person once I made myself imagine being a mother (which was very very hard). Everything just fell in place after that
So did you adopt? But if you never carried a baby inside you, how do you know it made no difference?
Do you know of good stuff to read about this? Or can you expand a bit on your experience (I realize EJMR is probably the last place one would want to do this)? My spouse and I are unlikely to be able to have kids, and we are considering adopting. But one of my big fears is that I would not feel a connection to the child, and the thought of raising somebody that feels alien terrifies me.
Thanks for sharing your experience. You are a brave person. I am in similar situation. I always wanted to be a mother, but it didn’t happen. I gave up that dream couple of years ago. My friends have been asking me to consider adopting but I’m too scared to do that. The thought of being a single parent in the USA scares the life out of me. Maybe one day I will be brave enough to do it. Idk.
Because I realized the infinite capacity to love another person once I made myself imagine being a mother (which was very very hard). Everything just fell in place after that
So did you adopt? But if you never carried a baby inside you, how do you know it made no difference?
The Twelve Days of Economics
One crazy co-author
Two code errors
Three reference letters
Four null results
Five working papers
Six bad referee reports
Seven rejected grant proposals
Eight eternal faculty meetings
Nine desk rejections
Ten whinny students
Eleven thousand unanswered emails
Twelve h-index and fallingAn h-index of 12 is pretty good.
Mine is actually higher than that but I still get snubbed by grad students at NBER SI. I should have worked that into the song somehow.
'Six snubs by future HRM lemons'
If you are surrounded by family and friends, that sounds doable. If not, the child will have a lonely life...
Thanks for sharing your experience. You are a brave person. I am in similar situation. I always wanted to be a mother, but it didn’t happen. I gave up that dream couple of years ago. My friends have been asking me to consider adopting but I’m too scared to do that. The thought of being a single parent in the USA scares the life out of me. Maybe one day I will be brave enough to do it. Idk.
Because I realized the infinite capacity to love another person once I made myself imagine being a mother (which was very very hard). Everything just fell in place after that
So did you adopt? But if you never carried a baby inside you, how do you know it made no difference?